All dressed up in a cab ride alone

[copied from my other blog, with it's comments from friends]

Attended a wedding in Austin with DH this weekend. It was one of those events to mark off the calendar and let a few wayward friends know how much I had missed them (will miss them) and how much I appreciated and valued their years of friendship just in case I don't see them for a while . I felt well enough as the reception ended late to join DH and a small group of bachelors and one couple, none of whom DH knows very well, at a downtown bar afterwards, and I truly enjoyed the company of the small group we were with, they were kind to me and and really funny...but by 1:30AM, as I was overdressed for the place to begin with, I couldn't relax and was simply just too tired to converse or stand anymore in my fitted designer dress and heels. And well, these are his friends anyway.

DH asked shortly if I was ready to go, I was calmly and happily sitting down and people watching at this point and just shrugged and said, no rush, whenever you are ready.
DH must have wanted me to leave because he told me I should go outside and get a cab back to the hotel, which was all of 4 minutes away, but too far to walk in my attire. I looked up at him surprised and said I hadn't brought any money in my evening bag, nor had I brought my cell phone, as the clutch didn't fit much besides camera and lipstick....and I was rather confused at his suggestion anyway...

DH pressed on and reminded me that there was an ATM machine outside.
I sat in shock, but kept a peaceful smile, for about 30 seconds and then decided that I wasn't going to protest. I did want to leave after all, even though I felt quite insulted to be leaving unescorted, but whatever. For the record, I had no intentions of trying to keep DH from his friends, if he wanted to stay out until 6AM, that was perfectly fine with me. But I was going home.

DH must have thought better of his practically pushing me out the door, as some of the other couples in the group surely would have wondered how or why I left alone, so after I said my goodbye's, he told them all BRB and followed me out. He swiftly walked me to an ATM to withdraw two $20 bills, one for himself and one for me, and even so kindly walked across the street with me, hailed a cab and tossed his suit jacket to me, asking me to hang it up in the hotel room.

The cab ride took 4 minutes and 4 dollars. I stepped out and walked into the lobby, where I found two drunk men gazing at me, not acquainted, waiting for an elevator. They clumsily missed one elevator because they forgot to hold it open as they watched me walk up from several yards away. Another door opened, and as I entered and pressed the button for floor 9, one of the guys slurred...."heeey, that's my floor too...." I nodded politely and looked away. It was a nice hotel, but it was 1:30AM and I shouldn't have been unescorted. It would have only cost DH four dollars to ride with me to the hotel and then go back to meet his friends.
I entered my room and undressed, carefully putting away the suit jacket and my new dress. I washed my face, brushed my teeth, moisturized and dressed for bed. Then I wept silently to sleep.

But not for the obvious reasons, just because this is what is, right now. Another nuanced indicator that could have occurred any other day, that I am almost there and why.

~peace


Lesli

Andrea, what a story. I almost had tears for you. You are such a selfless wife (and could easily freelance as a writer). That evening could have gone so many different ways in the end. Men are not attuned to things, i.e. our feelings, this just once again proves it. I'm certain you looked stunning as ever!! What pretty lady doesn't want to be swept up by her date/aka husband and appreciated. No matter how strong our exterior becomes ~ it has to ~ i think our guys forget we still have that very soft side. I may just be speaking for me, cuz I have been there, too. I hope you both have had a chance to discuss this. Love ya, Lesli
Posted by Lesli on Tuesday, September 23, 2008 - 10:29 PM [Reply to this] [Remove] [Block User]

Leah_Leanna

I know all to well where 'there' is and have the deepest sympathy that you now know also. I send you my very best wishes of comfort and support. Love to you!
Posted by Leah_Leanna on Monday, September 29, 2008 - 10:22 AM [Reply to this] [Remove] [Block User]